Who says simple sex can’t be amazing?
Vanilla sex is one of the proofs that you don’t need any fancy, wild moves to feel great.
Because sometimes, all you need other than love is comfort and the right touches in the right places.
Who knows—it can turn something from “just normal” into “just wow!”
So if that got you more interested in vanilla sex, then let’s see how something basic can feel so satisfying and full of surprises.
Let’s Have a Look at Vanilla Sex
Most people would agree: sex isn’t always fast, rough, intense, or kinky. As some folks prefer to keep things gentle, slow, comfortable, and relaxing.
This is where vanilla sex comes into the picture. Because when keeping things simple, it’s a vibe.
Vanilla sex can still involve any kind of steamy activity, just like:
- Kissing
- Oral Sex
- Penetration
- Sex between two people
- Using toys
These activities should be done with consent and in a straightforward way to be considered as vanilla sex. And it can also be the best time to hold your partner in a gentle way and look them softly in the eyes.
You can think of the missionary position when we talk about vanilla sex. It also doesn’t need to explore the physical, sexual, and mental limits of both partners, so both can stay in their comfort zones.
It’s a basic way to have sex, but the experience can be different for every person. You can ask 10 different pairs of partners, and they might describe it differently in a way.
Named after one of the most popular ice cream flavors in the world, people can enjoy it universally. However, some people can find the flavor “boring.”
But is vanilla sex truly boring? Well, you better get ready to upgrade your taste, because you’ll find out next how simple flavors can be so tasty.
Top Reasons Why Vanilla Sex Might Be the Hottest Sex
You can treat vanilla sex like a “getting back to the basics” activity. And want to know why its plainness overflows with substance? Because below are the key points that make vanilla sex feel so great.
1. Kisses Feel Good
When kisses are exchanged between partners, it’s always highly personal.
It can be challenging to give or receive kisses during kinky or rough sex, but it’s something you can do easy-peasy during vanilla sex.
Kissing can also improve sexual activity and give people better orgasms, because, as stated by Shellie Warren of xoNECOLE, kissing releases the feel-good hormones from the brain to make you feel hornier.
2. Hold That Gaze
When both partners exchange or maintain eye contact, it can also make sex super hot.
For some people, staring at each other in the eyes can be uncomfortable—and why?
Because locking eyes with your partner can be one of the highest forms of intimacy, as it pushes you to become more vulnerable.
Sure, it can feel awkward at first, but it can eventually strengthen the emotional connection between you.
3. The Appeal of the Missionary
Okay, people with vulvas, your attention is needed!
Yes, vanilla sex often involves the missionary position.
But do you know that if you prefer doing the missionary, it can highly give you intense orgasms? And according to Tom Hale of IFL Science, this position is perfect because it allows more blood flow in the clitoris.
Yet, if you want something more, you can check out this earpod vibrator that you can play with. It sucks and vibrates, even during range play, to boost your satisfaction—everything in one, single toy!
4. The Build-Up Matters
Sex can start longer before you get into the bedroom, and building some excitement by flirting is a big part of the experience.
During vanilla sex, there’s no rushing. You can light those candles, cuddle, or just spend some naughty time together.
These simple things can create that vibe that you need to make your intimacy more satisfying.
5. It’s Slow
When going vanilla, it can also help to keep you grounded, so you can enjoy your and your partner’s bodies way better.
The basic, unhurried setup can also help to make you last longer in bed.
Vanilla sex can help you stay present to enhance your focus so you can pay more attention to your partner’s reactions and cues.
6. It Helps You to Open Up
Vanilla sex can make you vulnerable, and vulnerability is quite important to make sex feel good.
And once you start to feel vulnerable, there’s a feeling of surrender.
Surrendering your desires is a grand way to feel good while you build a connection with your partner.
In fact, this feeling of surrender can make sex feel more intense, because you just don’t overthink anymore.
The Common Misconceptions About Vanilla Sex
Probably the main thing that separates vanilla sex from others is that it doesn’t involve any kink or fetishes.
And because it was described as something plain or conventional, there can be a lot of misconceptions going around about how good vanilla sex can be.
Find out how the stereotypical can be as hot as hell.
It’s Boring
If you’ve ever tried vanilla ice cream, you know it’s classic—and sometimes it can feel a little too simple, right?
So, that’s exactly the reason why you add some toppings to change the usual taste.
Vanilla flavor is great on its own, but it’s so versatile that you can turn it into shakes or even parfaits!
Then, you might want to apply this concept to vanilla sex; it’s delicious on its own, yet so customizable.
It’s Too Innocent
Most people see vanilla sex as too plain and innocent, but how about those folks that don't want to explore intense sex or kinks?
Although some couples engage in BDSM, it’s always treated as a “leveled-up” sex. Because most couples start with the basic methods and styles. So once you get good at it, then that’s the time to move on to the more advanced and kinky stuff.
It Doesn’t Feel Good
Orgasms shouldn’t be the sole focus of sex, because every step should feel good all the way.
Because allegedly, during vanilla sex, most penis owners can have a hard time reaching an orgasm—because it doesn’t live up to the standards of the porn clip they watched last night.
If you’re the type who can’t reach the big O during vanilla sex, while your partner prefers it, there are still other things that you can try to ace your game!
Not Great For Queer People
Because most people associate “deviant” activities with harsh sex (e.g., oral and anal), this misconception was formed.
But vanilla sex is more than that, and queer people can have fun with it just like everyone else.
And not every queer is into kink or fetishes, and some may prefer milder, traditional sex.
How You Can Make Vanilla Sex More Erotic
Now, let’s sprinkle in some new flavors to complement that sweet, creamy cornerstone to make your sex life more delicious.
Use a Vibrator
A vibrator can be an awesome tool to hit those pleasure spots to increase the potential of reaching orgasms.
If you’re a newbie to toys, you can check out this rabbit vibrator—so easy to use with a dual function, and beginner-friendly too!
Enjoy Porn With Your Partner
Porn was invented to arouse the people who watched it and give creative and fresh ideas about different preferences.
If watching porn together is your thing, it can also open some doors to let your partner know about your fantasies.
Add Some Sensory Play
The simplicity of vanilla sex is a great playground to stir up all five senses.
You can always incorporate warm massages, play some sexy music, and even bring cold foods into bed (vanilla ice cream, anyone?).
Sensory play is like dipping your toes into something you haven’t explored before, and it might awaken something in you that’s beyond your comfort zone.
Try Role Play
If you still find vanilla sex too predictable, you can always add role-play into your sessions.
Especially if the relationship is long-term, each day can feel a bit repetitive. Role-playing can broaden how you see sex once the situation starts to get too comfortable.
Do you mind having sex with a stranger by pretending you just met for the first time? Or a doctor and nurse pair playing naughty during the midnight shift?
Find out where the games will take you!
Are You Ready to Embrace Your Vanilla Side?
Vanilla sex may sound plain, but guess what? The plain, smooth flavor of vanilla is anything but boring!
Because once you keep things real and simple, that’s where the magic begins.
Just like your vanilla ice cream, it’s classic, comforting, and satisfying, and remember, you’re not boring if you like vanilla sex.
But if you want to make those moments much sweeter and more genuine, you can always find the best toys for you to help you celebrate your vanilla side genuinely.
After all, who says vanilla can’t be the life of the party?
