No speed, just feeling. Discover how the lotus sex position will make you savor every intimate moment.
Love the slow-burn? Then this classic position is best if you want to prioritize how you connect, rather than rapid thrusting.
The lotus sex position is perfect for candlelight evenings, post-argument make-ups, or just needing something heart-to-heart, because it boosts kissing, eye contact, and overall intimacy.
Next, you’ll find some tricks and comfy modifications to make the lotus sex position more romantic, and not like a yoga class gone wrong.
What is the Lotus Sex Position?
You can do the lotus sex position by facing your partner while sitting on the floor or bed.
It’s also derived from the yoga position, where a person can sit cross-legged on the floor, so it might take some leg flexibility.
This position is also portrayed as a tantric position, where one partner can sit on top of the other, wrapping their arms, and a great one if the couple loves to take it deep and see each other’s mugs during the action.
Let’s Discuss a Bit About Its History
The lotus sex position is the Western term for the position, but it’s originally termed as Yab-Yum (meaning father-mother in Tibetan), because the position shows a male and female figure doing tantric sex.
And although it presents a male-female image, anyone can enjoy it, regardless of gender, and this position is one that most therapists recommend for most couples, especially if they want to understand their relationship more.
But when we say tantric, it doesn’t only involve the position itself, but also how you breathe, and the target is always savoring the moment, instead of treating the orgasm as the main goal.
The best thing? It's not only spiritual, but you can enjoy this even without any penetration or orgasm, according to Oprah Daily.
What Advantages Can the Lotus Sex Position Bring to Your Relationship?
Let’s find out how the lotus sex position can bring a calmer yet sexier vibe to your lovemaking.
It Drives You Both to Get Intimate
Most of us always crave something that depends on our moods, and if you need some romance during sex, then you’ll never go wrong with the lotus sex position.
From start to finish, you embrace each other and see each other's face, and definitely not a position for a fast orgasm, but it can be so sensual when done right.
Give the Best Angle for Clitoral Fun
The lotus sex position also lets the vulva owner, who is usually on top, get more access to their clit and play with it, and because most vulva owners get off most by touching and playing with their clit, this position is perfect.
The vulva owner can also move their hips to rub their clit against their partner’s thing, or they can also go for a clitoral stimulator like BeYourLover Earpod Alggie when reaching between their legs.
You Can Customize Your Play
Once you make a few adjustments, you can already create a new variation for the lotus, and of course, each of them will give you a different feeling.
Just grind, lean, or bounce, whatever you dig, and as you embrace each other while rocking, it’s also a great chance to do some experimentation.
Another Great Position for Anal Play
From the list of sex positions you’ve tried, you may find that some of them just work either anally or vaginally.
But with the lotus sex position, there’s a lot of possibility; from vaginal to anal penetration up to clit and nipple play, and because you can always see each other’s face, the lotus can be a great choice for anal, because it allows better communication and you can also read each other’s facial expressions.
Anal play is considered safe, as long as you use the right toys for it, so grab some lube and use a high-quality anal toy like Vireo (if you want something full and beaded), and you’re good to go.
The Energy Feels so Right
If you believe in spirituality, then this position can help match your and your partner’s chakras, and probably the main reason why it just feels so sensual.
Chakras are the concentrated energy that runs through the body, as it starts from the pelvis to the top of the head, and matching your chakras by aligning your torso can make your body feel so in sync, and a harmonized chakra is relevant for our success, clarity, willpower, and purpose, according to Blueosa.
Want to Know How to Do the Lotus Sex Position and Do It Right?
Before anything, don’t forget to talk about things with your partner and ask for consent each time, so boundaries, comfort, and expectations should also be clear, because we’re deepening the connection here, and not the other way around.
First Up, Put Yourselves in the Position
To begin, the giver can sit cross-legged on the matted floor or bed, then the receiver can straddle them and position themselves by wrapping their legs around the giver. They should face each other.
If you guys prefer, you can also use couple's pillows for this position to help support your back or hips, to feel more comfortable when maintaining the position.
Lean Into Each Other and Leap Into Intimacy
Remember, the lotus sex position is made for sensuality, and it shouldn’t feel forced, so when doing some eye contact, make sure that it feels right and natural.
You can also let your foreheads stick together, and while wrapped inside each other’s arms, you can let your hands roam at your backs, shoulders, and other sensitive areas.
Aside from your hands, you can also use handheld vibrating wands like Sweet Bobo to give those areas vibes, which you can’t get from just touching, or use a nipple clamp like BeYourLover Camera Alberta to add an extra layer of sensation by playing with those nips.
Experiment With Your Rhythm
The feeling of closeness here is so real, because the eye contact can be super intense.
At the same time, it’s easier to adjust to the angle that you like, whether you’re grinding or rocking, or some couples prefer not to move at all. Bring a toy, some sensual massages, penetrate your partner or not, as long as it works for you.
Ready to Connect Much Deeper Through the Lotus Sex Position? Then Let’s Find Out Its Variations
Kneel to Give Those Thighs a Rest
To do the kneeling lotus sex position, the receiver lets their legs kneel on the surface, instead of wrapping them around their partner, so it's a great opportunity for the receiver to bounce and grind more, because their legs are freer than the classic lotus.
And since the receiver has more control right here, they can opt for a cock ring like this Toycod Barzillai to add that extra tingly pleasure for both partners.
Lean Back to Hit the G-spot
We can say that this other variation is the leaning type of the lotus position, because the receiver leans their body in the air, while using one arm for support.
And because of the angle, this helps hit the G-spot, so they can use a mini G-spot vibe like Tara as they lean, or the giver can caress the other partner’s breasts using their one hand, while the other supports the weight.
Giver Can Kneel for Power Thrusting
For this next variation, if the giver has that core and leg strength, they can elevate things a bit, while the receiving partner straddles them.
The receiver can straddle and wrap their legs around their partner like in the classic lotus sex position, and for the giver, they can lift their hips a bit to give space for those powerful and deeper thrusts.
Stretch Those Legs for Extra Comfort
Like the classic lotus, for this next variation, you still face each other and are on each other’s arms.
But the only difference is you both have to extend your legs on each other’s backs, so this variation is deemed more comfortable, especially if you need to take a break from cross-legging or preventing those pins-and-needles.
And because the genital area is more open, you might wanna take advantage of the extra space by using vibrators and strokers as you play.
Add a Fitness Ball for an Extra Bounce
If you’re tired of doing the lotus sex position on the bed or couch, then why not try a fitness ball?
To do this, all the giver has to do is sit comfortably on the ball, making sure they know where their center of gravity is; then the receiver can straddle them, and as the receiver bounces or grinds, the ball can add more flavor by encouraging the movements.
But, a piece of advice, choose a fitness ball that’s durable enough to hold both of your weights to prevent any mishaps.
Legs Up for That Added Depth
For this next variation, instead of the receiver wrapping their legs around their partner, they can put them on their shoulders instead.
This lets the giver have more control, because they’ll bear all of the receiver’s weight, and this variation may need a strong core and arm strength from the giver.
Lifting the receiver’s legs in the air is also great for deeper penetration, especially for givers who lean on the smaller side, or if the couple wants to try the cervical orgasm.
Lift Those Hips to Burn More Calories
This last variation looks like a workout because it is. And using those arms and feet to lift their bodies together can help the couple find better angles.
This variation is also great for anal penetration, or even using an anal toy like this strawberry-shaped one, to give the receiver that double penetration to feel much fuller.
FAQs
My partner and I like to try it, but one of us is too tall. What should we do?
That’s easy to work with, as long as you have some pillows or higher chairs.
How can we make the lotus sex position feel more sensual?
Just try to keep the pace easy, stay close, and don’t rush the moment.
What if my partner starts to get shy when we’re doing the position?
That’s totally normal, and you can always start gently and let it build up, or use variations where your faces are less aligned.
The Lotus is Slow, Soft, Yet Still Hot
The lotus sex position will only work if you stop treating it as something to “get through,” and once you treat it as a way to savor each moment, then it’ll definitely make a difference in your relationship.
It just gives you that room to breathe, yet it keeps you very connected, so you’re both emotionally plugged in while diving in pleasure, and with just a few adjustments, you can always make another variation that’ll suit your bodies and play much better.
But if you ever need more to make the experience much smoother and satisfying, you can always drop by BeYourLover and check our list of body-safe toys and other accessories to make your setup more effortless and enjoyable.
Special Thanks:
Samantha Vicentey - Writer - Oprah Daily
If the lotus sex position piqued your interest, then you’d better check these guides for pleasure, like the Wheelbarrow Position, 10 Crazy Sex Positions, and BDSM 101.
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