Stop feeling guilty about your sexual fantasies

Repressing what you like to do in bed is bad for your most intimate relationships.

The probability that your fantasies are the same as those of your friends, those of your neighbors and, however uncomfortable it may be, those of your parents, is very high. You’re not the only person who has these kinds of fantasies, so it’s possible you have nothing to worry about.

Stop rejecting your own fantasies and start accepting that they are part of your personality. For this, you need to assimilate what some psychologists call the shadow, the part of us that concentrates all the desires and needs (whether sexual or not) that scare us because we think they should not exist.

In this way, while your sexual fantasies remain hidden, you will never feel complete and you will constantly ask yourself what happens to you and how you can fix it. However, just as you can begin to realize that your sexual fantasies are common, you can also begin the path to self-acceptance, since one of the greatest advantages of accepting the fantasies that live in our shadows is to have more control over the uncertainty and choose the best way to manifest them.

By repressing our desires, we stop controlling them and it is they who dominate us. However, accepting a fantasy does not mean having to perform it, since in the end it is everyone who decides to live according to their beliefs and values. Recognizing that control gives us power and frees us, much better than living governed by fear.

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